https://www.stephencovey.com/7habits/7habits-habit5.php
I have read over this article so many times, on a few different days, trying to think of what to say, and how to reflect. I really wanted to let the concept of this Habit to sink deep into me, because I believe it is something we all do, whether we realize it or not.
My organization had a class the past two days on Effective Listening and Feedback, and it had everything to do with what Covey is talking about in this article.
Personally, I do this a lot, I always say "I can relate...", because in my line of work I deal with other people constantly, whether it be on the phone or face to face. This phrase always seems to calm a person down, or make them more susceptible to what I have to say to them, and make them feel better all around. However, I can appreciate when it may be best to leave my opinion or personal recall out of the conversation, and just listen.
Oh, to just simply listen when someone is talking to you can be such a difficult task. I know for some of my fellow Millennials (who are all about technology) a text, or a quick comment on Facebook seems to get a point across just as effectively as talking to someone face to face, and I think that right there is how society as a whole is losing what it means to LISTEN to someone.
Most modes of conversation used today are all one sided, no back and forth. Sure, there is the 'reply' button, but we are losing even the simplest listening skills by only throwing a response into the wavelengths and expecting a person to get what we are saying.
There is no emotion, or tone, or eye contact, or feeling in a text message. The message you type to someone is up to them to interpret, no matter what the content is about.
Humor me with this; check your last email conversation. I am sure the very first email, whether to or from yourself, is about a paragraph long, full of a task or questions. Now go to the very last of those emails, I am willing to vouch that it is only one or two worded. The conversation dwindled from a paragraph to just a few words, because when we are communicating through technology there is no back and forth. We are constantly looking for a response, we read a message with only the intent to respond until the conversation has nothing left for us to respond to.
Don’t get me wrong, I truly believe in the benefits of technology, text messages, Facebook and other social media. However, I also believe in the power of communication by face to face interaction. I would like to encourage you to have a face to face conversation with someone, anyone, and just simply listen to them. Strike up a conversation and simply submerge yourself in hearing what that person has to say about anything, with no intent to respond back. Appreciate a conversation without an objective.
